Sierra November India Papa Echo Romeo

My breathing quickens, my blood rushes, sending more oxygen to my brain, then my mind and thoughts flash in a flurry of possibilities and scenarios - too many and too fast to make sure i make the right choice. I start to feel the heat on the surface of my cheeks. What is supposedly cold and dry is now searing with beads of sweat forming on my face. My chest tightens. My muscles tense up. My throat dries up and constricts. My vision is not clear, its darting from whatever possible weapon there is. Its all a blur, all out of focus.

I've made my choice, i've chosen my words, i've chosen my reaction, i've chosen rage. I'm just one step away from violence, a position i've always been close to. I've been successful in controling, but this time, he's crossed the line, his sheer idiocy is the cause for this rage. I'm not even sure if it is idiocy. Maybe its to spite me.

He reacts to my threat. I've given him three seconds, and he still doesn't move. Now i'm on my way to using brute force. I know i shouldn't, but my chest feels tight with rage and what i think goes out the window, and so should he. He backs away just before i make my threats a reality. The only wise move so far.

My fists are balled so hard i could feel every joints presure. I try to loosen up my grip, but it just gets tighter. Every violent scenario is played with careful detail in my mind, now that i have the time. I start to wonder why i put up with this. Wonder why i havent shattered his kneecaps already. Wonder why i'm not dangling him by a rope from the top floor. Wonder why i'm not tying him to a chair and slowly carving his skin off. Wondering why i'm not sliting his abdomen and puling his guts all over him, giving him about a half hour with his guts squirming on his chest before he dies.

Then i wright this, and all the while, in the back of my mind, always questioning if i am going to post this. Still feeling like punching him in the face, hopefully breaking his nose. he deserves it. but i know i don't deserve bear the consequences. I deserve to punch him though. I'm a fraction calmer than i was twenty minutes ago, this is still going to shuttle my BUA... ARGH!

I've tried anger management, all that breathing deep, counting to ten, closing my eyes and visualising something nice. Truth be told, they all don't work. Writing only pauses it. Whats best is punching the wall till your knuckles start to tear a bit. thats just enough for mild rage. You should then know what severe rage needs...

Okay, so lately its been rather evident that I've been needing a job - both for money adn something productive to do during weekends. So i went job hunting for restaurants or anything related to the H&T course i'm doing. Now, the thing is, due to the fact that i went for the 789 job with An Ying, we've been working at/looking for the same place to work. Only difference is, she's working for exposure, i want money ...heheh $_$

So the first place we went to was a restaurant called "Good Evening Bankok" and they were mre than willing to hire us. Thing was, we werent really set on commiting, in hopes of getting a place with better pay. Okay, okay, I was hoping for better pay. Anyways, after that we went to Oneworld hotel to see if we could get a banqueting job, they said they'd call us the moment they had a function. Well, its been a month and i have yet to hear from them. So that concluded our first hunt for a job. The three of us (Me, An Ying, and David) were still jobless.

Round two. This time it was me, An Ying, and Ting Ling. We went to One utama agian and just started asking. We went to Soho and Italiennies for interviews, and they both gave us the same answer - we'll call you back. Well, we didn't expect to hear from them again. Onedays later, Soho calls An Ying up and tells us to show up on the nxt day (Sunday) for the job. well...yay? Okay, first day was as normal, clear tables and set them up. Unfortunately, i can't speak Cantonese...and thats the meduim here... T.T now i know how An Ying feels in an English speaking environtment.

Okay, i was miserable. i hated that place, the people were friendly, smiles and all, chatting with us during breaks, encouraging us. Thing was, i was out of my element. Its like telling Brian to become a Pro-wrestler. anyways, i had a feeling of dread the whole week, just thinking aout the place made my fuse shorter.

Anyway, on Thursday, just as i chucked my bag in the corner of my room, i got a call from An Ying. Italiannies wants us to come in on Friday to work. I thought she was crazy, we cant work for two joints. I guess it wasn't enough that they made me Chef of the day for the following week and that i had a job at a place i disliked on weekends...now she wants me to work for two joints and sacrifice my Fridays as well. Well, okay, she made a pont when she said we'd just try it out and pick the better of the two and just quit the one. Well, i liked Italiannies better. Ah!!! English! never missed it so much before.

Why i picked Italiannies over Soho? well, the pay is the same, the location is also pretty much the same, and they're both casual dining joints. But, apart from the language issue, Italiannies trained us better, and thus we may rise trough the ranks (hopefully) faster as well. Most of the people here are friendly, the managers (those whom i've met) are just as nice. Just don't piss em' off...(someone got fired today)

Well, i might just extend my work hours, and i'm already working on Fridays... there you go...thats what loving money does to you, i'm not so much a workoholic as i am a blowasmuchcashonfrivialitiesanduselessthingsasyoucan-A-holic..roflmao...go ahead, take teh ten minutes you need to see what that actually says...

p.s. okay, i understand that i have virtaully NO pictures on this sight, but the thing is, hwile i'm working or having fun, its a bit hard to take a pic, either that or its because i have no camera... so... es tut mir aber leid!...

CHEERS!!!

Ok, how long was it since i had a post? No matter, I haven't had the time lately, plus, i was always too tired and bummed to write one when i had the time. But now, i'm sitting at the table, with my laptop hooked to the net, and i have a cup of tea right next to me, so i'm good to go. So, you must be thinking "no time? pffft! lame excuse! tired? LAMER!!" well, the following events would explain it.

On August 30th, that's almost a week ago, we had the food fest. I was psyched to enter a new post into my blog, but as it would normally be, i was dead tired. Came home, played some games, went out to dinner, and got a bit pissed off. no matter, it was a holiday the next day and i could sleep in.

Anyways, back to the food fest. We did Mis En Place on Wednesday, that would be the 29th. We went in at 12.30 and we were the first, so we layed claims to our utensiles, equipment, and work space. I booked a pretty big place, about 1/6 of the whole kitchen. Our supervising lecturer was Mr. Gerhard, a German chef lecturer. He has a unique humor, we found it amusing, a bit eccentric, but ammusing.

He had us prepare our things, cut this, gut that, skin that, fetch that, peel this, dice that, mince these, chop this, store this, squeeze this, go fry yourself...etc... So, we pretty much had our stuff ready, they just needed some packing and cooking. One by one, my team left, nothing to do right? We were told to help the other things, and so the remainding members helped out, and when we were done, well...we left...big snafu... We also found out that the spelling on the flyer for the shepherds pie was all wrong (we spelt shephard)...fubar!

Next day we came to the kitchen, first thing he does is grill me for letting my guys leave early. Well, i apologised, he was right anyway. So we started packing and cooking. Well, actually, Mr Gerhard did most of the work, we were too clueless to leave alone *sheepish grins*. We were making 100 pax of shepherds pie (this would sound familar to all interacters working during IU day in KK) and 250 pax of hot dogs with two settings. once the first batch of food was ready, they were brought down. The shepherds pie sold like hot ...pie...? The hot dogs? not so hot...

I was kinda chuffed about the pie. Every batch that went down, didn't last more than a few seconds. Ivo said that they never made it to our counter (we had to walk trough the crowd of customers). At the end of the day, we had to make an extra 70 pies which we sold at 4 a piece (that would make 170 X 4 = 680) and we sold about an estimate of 150 hotdogs at 3, 70 at 2.5 and another 30 at 1 (this would make 450 + 175 +30) the cost production was about 0.945 cents a piece for the hotdogs, so no matter what, we still profitted. *big smiles*

So, at the end of the day, after we finished cleaning up, after we tabulated everything, after buying food that was so cheap (due to the fact that they still had food to sell and sales time was over) i went home. Okay, i know there should be some pictures, but they're with Ali and this post was long due. I'll post them pictures on next time ok? i'm just gonna watch another movie now...bonjournee!